Care amidst the Chaos

A finch landed in front of me at a traffic light this morning. 

Before my mind could finish thinking about how dangerous it was for something so small to be hopping and swooping about in traffic, it flew off to join hundreds more I had not even noticed roosting upon the wires above the road.  Each took their turns diving into traffic hoping, I suppose, to find nourishment among the cars.  I was struck by the fragility of the moment, how something so delicate could fearlessly go about its business among the chaos of modern transportation.     

I wish this happened more than it does, but sometimes in moments like this one, God speaks to me.  Watching this little bird I heard the Words of Jesus, “…not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father.  And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.  So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” (Matthew 10:29 – 31) 

It turns out they can do what they need to do, unafraid, because our Father cares for them.

And the same is true for me and you.  There is something so sweet, so tender and comforting in the idea that our Father knows.  He pays attention to the things we often fail to notice and is even concerned about the details that we can’t manage or control.  Sovereignly, He reassures us of His provision and care.

And so it turns out, we can do what we need to do – without fear – because our Father cares from us.

Late to the Party

I admit it. We are late to the party – by about 20 years!

Last year as we were going through a lengthy study of Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, I began to wonder why the effectiveness of the New Testament church seemed so foreign to me.  I had read about it many times in the book of Acts and even studied church history in college.  What became clear to me, cast me into a personal metamorphosis that would result in complete overhaul of our ministry model.  It occurred to me…

We don’t experience the same things they did because we don’t do church like they did.

I know the culture has changed and that our situation is largely different.  But frankly, the needs of people’s hearts – our – hearts, have not.  And honestly, it has been my experience that what we know and what we are comfortable with have replaced the simple, effective ministry of the New Testament. 

Looking back, the church grew exponentially at Pentecost.  And they stayed together with mutual commitment, “…And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers…” (Acts 2:42)  And they multiplied through community, “…And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.” (Acts 2:46 & 47)

Can I just say - that is what I want! 

I want to see God add to our number as often as He chooses and as much as He chooses.  So we set out on course to model our church after the pattern revealed in the book of Acts.  Commitments were made to the Word, to prayer and to fellowship.  Small groups were started to build relationship and create community within our body.

So far it has been more successful than I could have imagined.  The dynamic within our church is changing.  People are growing.  They are finally getting to know people they have been in church with for years.  I know we are late to the party but…

Better late than never!

Grace in the Command

We’ve been studying the 10 Commandments for two weeks on Sunday mornings.  It is something that I have done in every one of the 3 churches I have pastored now.  But this is fresh, a new study with new perspective.  And it has been revelatory to me in many ways, no doubt having to do with my own spiritual journey.  I’d like to share with you how…

There is grace in the commandments. 

I had been taught that, but had never seen it.  Not like this anyway.  In verse 2 of Exodus chapter 20, God says, ““I am the Lord thy God, which have brought thee out of the land of Egypt, out of the house of bondage.”  The language is important because it implies relationship.  God identifies Himself as the Redeemer of Israel, and designates Israel as the redeemed. 

Here is where grace comes in. 

Israel was not redeemed by keeping these laws, or any other for that matter.  These laws were given to them because they had been redeemed and they belonged to the God who ransomed them out of slavery in Egypt.  It is a blessing peculiar to Israel, but also applicable to those of us who live in the age of grace.

Our Heavenly Father relates to us in the same way.  Sin’s ransom has been paid upon the Cross of Christ.  “…It was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ…” (1 Peter 1:18 – 19)

We therefore belong to Him.  And we reveal we belong to Him by doing what He asks.  In 1st John 5:3 scripture says, “For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome (grievous – KJV).”  Jesus put it this way in John 14:15: “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.”   

If there is grace on the commandments, then there is also relationship.  It is forged in the fires of redemption and it enables us to enjoy God the most as we are most satisfied in Him. 

Maybe I'm not so good at this...

OK...I'll admit it.  I'm a not as good at this as I thought.

My wife is visiting her sister and our newly arrived nephew in Arizona.  If you do the math, that means I'm at home with my 2 and 4 year old.  Yeah...I'm tired.   You know, the left eye twitching kind of tired.  Don't get me wrong.  I've got lots of help from gracious people in our church, which by the way, makes me think they know something I'm just coming to terms with.

My wife is infinitely better at being a parent than I am.  And I'm not just saying that because I miss her, she is and I am proud of her for it.  Perhaps this is what God saw in Adam when He looked at the crown of His creation and said, "It is not good for man to be alone..." (Genesis 2:18).  

Perhaps this is what Solomon was hinting at when he wrote Proverbs 31.  "An excellent woman, who can find? She is more valuable than precious jewels.  The heart of her husband safely trusts her..." (Proverbs 31:10&11).  

And it is what I am realizing now, I need my wife.  I can't do this without her and I don't want to.

Many women have done excellently.  But you my dear, surpass them all! (Proverbs 31:29)

I don't ever want to hear I can't!

This morning a good friend and I went for an extended bike ride.  We left the house plenty early and set out across the Northwest Arkansas country side.  We talked as we rode and decided to leave town on a route that put us on a pretty good climb almost immediately. 

He might have accused me of being crazy. 

In truth, I was just a glutton for punishment.  The night before I had looked at the route on the internet and checked the elevations just to know what we would be up against.  After looking, I didn’t sleep very well. 

Back to the ride.  After 38 miles, we stopped for a Coke in a little town called Goshen.  We stretched a little and tried to mentally prepare for the pain that what coming.  Several miles down the road was a 4 mile leg-searing climb up out of the White River Basin.  And it was in my head.  

Normally when I am riding I don’t think about much.  Today was different.  Midway up the climb, over the sound of my own pulse, I heard my dad’s voice.  I time-traveled to1982 when I was learning to waterski.  I thrashed and struggled trying to get my ski binding back on after a fall.  I wanted to quit and I told him I told him I couldn’t do it. 

He said, and I quote… “I don’t ever want to hear I can’t!” 

I got mad.  And now as I was entertaining thoughts of walking, I was mad again.  Mad at myself.  Mad at the hill.  Mad at my bike. Funny thing is though, the same fury that helped me get my ski binding back on drug me up that hill.

Later that afternoon, as I was on my way to a lunch appointment it occurred to me how appropriate that lesson was for certain seasons of life.  Let’s face it, life is uphill.  Sometimes we get to coast, most of the time we climb.  In truth the buildup is much worse, but we still have to make it up that hill.  And with every fiber of our being, we press on toward the goal (Philippians 3:14). 

And we tell ourselves… “I don’t ever want to hear I can’t!”

Hugging the Hurt

I have discovered another spiritual irony of sorts. 

Sunday morning we were studying leadership in Acts 27, a passage that illustrates a profound truth.  Leadership ability is revealed in crisis situations.  It is not unlike patience in that regard.  To have patience, you’ll have to endure situations that require it.  So it is with leadership, you’ll learn it by going through situations that require it. 

I had challenged our congregation to embrace crisis because in in my view, we have managed to create a culture within the church that refuses to deal with problems.  We bury them, decline to speak of them and for pride's sake consider other people's perception of us more important than finding the help we need.  Not only does this environment fail to foster genuine relationships, it takes away opportunities to lead. 

The irony is that what I had taught was immediately put to the test.  The events of this weekend and the bad news of Monday morning – my mistakes, the cancer, and any number of other problems – were more or less situations that would require it.

It’s hard to plug in to problems, especially when they could have been avoided.  Those are the ones that hurt me the most.  But those are also the ones that have the most to teach us. 

So as the flood waters of Monday morning recede, I know that someday they will return. 

And because of that I’m learning to hug the hurt. 

Flood Waters Rising

I picked a day of all days to start writing a blog.  The truth is I sat down to write, hoping for some relief.  And in the hopes of finding said relief, I am going to be transparent. 

I messed up yesterday. 

I wasn't paying attention and allowed a conversation to take place that put a member of our ministry team in the cross-hairs for criticism.  It was unintentional, but as pastor, that one is on me.  And I regret it deeply.  So I spent the night at odds with myself, even my wife.  And I woke up this morning after what was only a few minutes of sleep to the news that my grandmother has terminal cancer that has invaded her entire body.  Really?

The man in me feels like I am being a baby.  He tells me it'll be fine and to move on.   The pastor and husband in me knows I messed up.  He feels like the world is coming to an end.  And now I am worried about my family.  My mom has battled cancer for nearly 3 years and is still fighting.  Now her mom will not have much of a fighting chance against the same disease.  The son and grandson in me just wants to go home. 

I am on empty.

So this morning, I put my head down and I pray for help to be strong in the Lord and the power of His might (Ephesians 6:10).  I know the same afflictions I experience, my brothers and sisters experience too.  I know I am not alone, so I beg for mercy from Him who is long suffering toward us and whose tender mercies will not fail (Psalm 25:6). 

There is no simple fix for this one.  No magic pill.  The flood waters are rising.  The fire is kindled.  So I choose to trust His promise to me, for my kin and my faith family.

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you. For I am the Lord your God, the Holy One of Israel, your Savior." (Isaiah 43:2 - 3)